DODGERS The PHOTO CAPTION Thread

LEAGUE: "Hey brah, remember last year when you were the man and I was scuffling?..."
WILSON: "Yeah..."
LEAGUE: "And I was like, hey brah, how do I get back on track?..."
WILSON: "Yeah, yeah..."
LEAGUE: "And you were like, hey brah, go fucken figure it out for yourself?..."
WILSON: "Yeah, so?!!!"
LEAGUE: "Yeah, well now I'm the man and you suck, so now YOU go fuck yourself brah!!!"
WILSON: :angry:
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LOPES: "Okay, here's another..."
DBB: "Fire away, Davey, I feel hot today!!!"
LOPES: "Uh, yeah... 10 across, nine letter last name of baseball's most inept manager..."
DBB: "Hmmm... how 'bout a hint?..."
LOPES: "Starts with an M..."
DBB: "Hmmm... ugh... um..."
LOPES: "Ends in INGLY..."
DBB: "Hmmm... hah... huh..."
LOPES: "ATT in the middle?..."
DBB: "Ummm... ugh... nah! Sorry, I got nothing!..."
LOPES: "You fucken said it, Bubba..."
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AGON: "I might be struggling now, but I'll be nails once we hit September..."
BUNDY: "No niggah, y'all needz 2 b hitting alwayz!"
DEE: "Hope u ain't talking 2 me, cuz I been carryin this mutha fukka!"
BUNDY: "I'm talkin 2 all you niggahz! Davey, drop sum knowligz on these fools!"
LOPES: "Fukk dat, this naggahz got 2 go take a dump, yo!"
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KEMP: "Damyummm, Joe Carter! Wut an honor!"
JOE: "Yeah, yeah, whatev meat."
KEMP: "Um, Joe... wut u doin wit my bat?"
JOE: "A lot more than you."
KEMP: "Nah, son... my swingz cummin 'roun."
JOE: "Thatz the prob with u niggahz deez dayz... alwayz got sum fukkin excuse!"
KEMP: "Um, my bat?"
JOE: "Bakk in my day, rookz like u hadda lot mo respect..."
KEMP: "I ain't no rook, bkitch... no gimme bakk my bat fo i fukk u up!!!"
JOE: "THERE!!! There's dat fire I wuz lookin fo. It wuz just barried down deep!!!"
KEMP: "Speekin a barried down deep, duran duran called n axed fo dat shurt bakk."
JOE: [muttering] "Punk ass bitch."
KEMP: [muttering] "Crazy ole fool."
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MALHOLM: "Hey everyone, thanks for coming out!"
DAD: "I should have pulled out."
MOM: "I should have had an abortion."
WIFE: "I should have married a Dominican middle infielder."
KID: "I wish I had been still born."
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TRAINER: "Yo man, I think u broke something!"
TURNER: "Seriously, why would you think that?"
TRAINER: "Cuz u leaking carrot juice, bkitch!"
TURNER: "Great, everybody's a fucken comic "
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KEMP: "Yo man, grate 2 meet u Diddy."
SONGZ: "Yo man, I ain't Diddy!"
KEMP: "Damn, my bad Mr. Usher."
SONGZ: "I ain't Usher either fool!
KEMP: "Oh shit, Chris. I swear... Rihanna wuz comin on 2 me dawg!!!"
SONGZ:
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lol, didn't even know who he was tbh

 

PUIG: "Yo man, check out Adrian running like the border patrol's after him."
URIBE: "Yeah, but at least he didn't have to take a raft to get here."
PUIG: "Man, fuck you bkitch!!!"
URIBE:
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GIAMBI: "Good to see you again Mark!"
BIG MAC: "You too Jason, I have fond memories of our time in Oakland together."
GIAMBI: "And I still have some needle marks in my ass."
BIG MAC: "Everybody's a fucken comedian..."
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KID: "Which lady?"
ROJAS: "That one, the skanky bitch with the big jugs."
KID: "Wait, the one in the blue sweatshirt?"
ROJAS: "Yup, that's the one I banged last night."
KID: "Dude, that's my fucken mom!"
ROJAS: "Oh shit, hope she didn't kiss you with that mouth of her's."
KID: "Why, what do you mean?"
ROJAS: "I mean, every time you kiss her, you're pretty much sucking my dick too!"
KID:
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"Now was it loop first then tie, or tie first then loop? Man this managing shit is tough..."
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OREL: "Good to see you again Nuke!"
NUKE: "Never mind that, wherez all tha white bitches?"
OREL: "Huh, what?"
NUKE: "I said wherez all tha white bitches, bkitch!!!"
OREL: "I wouldn't know Nuke, I'm not really into all that kind of..."
NUKE: "So, not a fan of tha ladies?"
OREL: "No, that's not it at all. It's just that I'm a Christian and..."
NUKE: "Oh, so youz a faggot!"
OREL: "No, good God no! It's just..."
NUKE: "Whatever choir boy, I'm gonna go find me sum white bitches!"
OREL: "You know, the Bible says..."
NUKE: "Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Bible said I shouldn't have coveted your ex-wife. But damn, that bitch wuz a freak!"
OREL: "Wuw... you were with my Jamie???"
NUKE: "Nailed that shit shut homey. Why u think she divorced your punk ass?"
OREL: "I can't believe my Jamie was unfaithful!"
NUKE: "I wouldn't call it unfaithful. After all, she kept screaming His name."
OREL:
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KENLEY: "So iz it true you wuz with Orel's wife?"
NUKE: "Let's just say... she knew Orel, but I introduced her to oral."
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RIGHETTI: "Okay, what's the fucken problem?"
POSEY: "Javy can't get it up."
LOPEZ: "I swear... this has never happened before."
RIGHETTI: "Fucken faggots, we've got a game to win! Worry about that homo shit after the game!!!"
POSEY: "But we were supposed to go to the rainbow district tonight."
LOPEZ: "And now I won't be able to perform."
RIGHETTI: "Oh shit, why is your pecker so brown?!!!"
POSEY: "Because it was up my ass earlier, duh."
LOPEZ: "Yeah, duh."
RIGHETTI: ~Fucken faggots
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DAUGHTER: "Hey Mom, who's the asshat in the Dodger uni?"
MOM: "Be respectful, honey! That's Andre Ethier... he used to play for the Dodgers."
ETHIER: "Used to?!!!"
DAD: "Yeah, believe it or not, he was actually a somewhat serviceable player at one time."
ETHIER: "Somewhat serviceable?!!!"
SON: "Yeah, but now he sucks ass!"
ETHIER: "Sucks ass?!!! Man, fuck you fucken slopes!!!"
DAUGHTER: "Wow, racist."
MOM: "It's okay, honey! You'd be upset too if you could no longer adequately field your position."
DAD: "or hit lefties..."
SON: "or righties..."
[brief silence, then...]
ALL*:

* except Ethier
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PUIG: "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned..."
PRIEST: "You're not doing roids, are you son?!!!"
PUIG: "No, fuck... I mean, God... I mean, Heavens... I mean..."
PRIEST: "Relax, son. A simple yes or no will suffice."
PUIG: "Okay, sorry... no, Father."
PRIEST: "Haven't knocked up any women, have you son?"
PUIG: "No, Father."
PRIEST: "You're not a homosexual, are you son?"
PUIG: "No, Father... but I think Kemp might be a little..."
PRIEST: "Yeah, no shit!"
PUIG: "I'm sorry. What was that, Father?"
PRIEST: "Umph, never mind. So back to you, how have you sinned?"
PUIG: "Ummm, I keep having these evil thoughts about killing our manager, Donnie Baseball."
PRIEST: "Tell you what... Keep playing the way you've been playing, and we're cool!"
PUIG: "Really, but what about my evil thoughts?"
PRIEST: "What, you think we all don't have those exact same thoughts?!!!"
PUIG: "Yes, but Father?"
PRIEST: "But Father, my ass. I'd kill that hayseed cunt myself if there weren't consequences..."
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